A little about me…

What could I tell you about me?  First let me say I’m just like you, human.  Though I was born into a wonderful Christian home my life has not been perfect or without trouble.  As a teenager I made a foolish decision that altered my life and caused me pain beyond belief.  However it was this very pain that started me on a journey of truly finding out who God was for myself.  I needed and wanted to know him because I desperately needed him to fix my life.  I really didn’t think I deserved his help but I asked anyway.  I spent several years in loneliness and tears trying to raise two children as a single mom and battling my value and the big ugly monster of fear.  Fear that I would always be alone.  Fear that it would always be this way.  Fear of physical danger because of what I had been through.  Fear that I was now disqualified for anything worth while in life.  And fear that no one would ever want me now.  It was a humbling and horrible time but I can honestly say it was the goodness of a loving father who let me go through it because he wanted to answer my hearts cry to know him.  Because he’s faithful it worked.  I learned how I could depend on him when I was alone.  I learned he provides when there is no money or food or gas or diapers or Christmas presents.  I learned he would protect me from harm when I was most vulnerable.  I learned he loved me no matter what I did or deserved.  That’s whats so amazing about his love, his grace and his mercy.  He didn’t give me what I deserved and he did give me what I didn’t deserve.

I have been married to same God given answer to every women’s prayer of a husband for 23 years going on forever and I’m still crazy about that man.  We have four children and one grandchild.  They are my treasures in this life.   My continued journey hasn’t been without more heartache and trouble because, let me tell you, it has had plenty but Jesus has been the one on the other side of the rope pulling me through each time.  I don’t have any reason to think that I deserve you’re attention, not to mention your time to read what I write.  For goodness sake I am far from a grammar major and I was terrible with spelling in school.  Funny how God sometimes uses the least likely.  My hope is that maybe, just maybe I can encourage someone who’s where I used to be.  Life is hard sometimes plain and simple but God is always faithful and always good.  Always!